OCD Garou Are Still Good

9/21/2005

09:03 PM
Logfile from GarouMUSH.

Currently the moon is in the waning Gibbous Moon phase (77% full).
It is currently 21:00 Pacific Time on Wed Sep 21 2005.

Barnyard
The lane wends its way back and around the farmhouse to here, where it widens into a broad, grassy sward contained only by the woods which encircle it on three sides. Buildings break up the purity of the landscape: an open-sided structure which serves as a garage and the big barn, empty of livestock, to the east. A good-sized vegetable and herb garden furrows the land south of the barn, while a pyramid-like pile of rocks, of similar consistency to the gravel of the lane, rests a few yards south of the garage.
North of the buildings, the fields have long been fallow, hastening a conversion from farmland to natural prairie. A sliding glass door allows admittance to the farmhouse, the interior obscured by Levolor(tm) blinds in a wood-grain pattern. The lane leads out around the house to the southwest. The discerning can just barely pick out the beginnings of a faint path into the woods towards the southeast.
(Non-Garou, please "+view curse")
Contents:
Justin
Obvious exits:
FIelds  BArn  Farmhouse  Lane  Woods  

It's dark out, and in the 50s but clear. The moon is up, past full now and wanning again. In the woods near the farm house Justin is sitting on a fallen tree. From his spot he can clearly see the farm house but the odds are no one at the farm house could see him. Still, he's not hidden at all so anyone at all in the woods and alert would probably notice his clothing in the darkness. The faint moon light reflects off of his pale white long sleeve shirt. His form is slightly slumped over, but he's still sitting.

Working her way from the woods, Yi approaches the Fang cub from behind. Her footfalls are quiet with practiced silence. When she's not quite on top, the Gnawer ragabash purposely breaks the stillness. "Good evening."

Justin blinks, and turns around abruptly, caught off guard. He jumps a bit, and in the moon light it's clear there's a little bit of something shiny on his face. Looks like the kid is crying, or was. He stares at you a moment, looking unsure really what he should do. The look is classic flight of fight stunned panic as he evaulates the situation, trying to recognize whoever suprised him.

Yi stays still long enough for the Fang to recognize her, even in the shadows. Clearly, she remembers him. "Justin, was it not? Do you remember me? I am Yi." If she's noticed he's crying, the Gnawer makes no comment after it.

Justin sniffles a bit then tries to compose himself, pulling out one of his ever present wipes to clean up a bit. He works on composing himself then says, "Y... yeah... I'm Justin." He says then nods, "You're a Bone Gnawer, right? Um... Yi?" The kid's got a good memory it seems. He looks rather distraught at the moment over something.

Yi nods, giving the cub time to compose himself. The wipes garner a passing glance, but not much more than one would give someone pulling out a handpack of tissues. "I am also called Runs-the-Gauntlet, fostern ragabash of the Bone Gnawers." She tilts her head at the sight of the cub. "Is something wrong?"

Justin looks a bit flustered, "Yes... No... I don't know..." He gives a shrug then his shoulders slump, "It's all just kind of crashing in on me right now. I'm not doing very well and just couldn't deal with all the people in the farm house. I'm not supposed to leave it but... I just needed to get away." He says softly, "I'm not running away." He says to clarify, in case it's not clear.

"That is good, that you are not running away," Yi agrees. "And also good you are realizing what is going on." The fostern looks skywards, towards the waning galliard's moon. "How long have you been here now?"

Justin thinks about it, "Um... almost two weeks... two weeks this Saturday, week and a half." He says as he does the quick math. He glances up at the moon then back down at the dark earth at his feet, staring at it instead. "Spent almost half of it bleeding or in the infirmary...." He says softly.

Yi manages to chuckle faintly, looking back down to the Fang. "So I would guess. You have some bad luck, to be introduced to the Garou on the full moon." She gestures to a spot on the tree. "May I?"

Justin nods, "Sure." He says softly, "Pleanty of room... nice tree." He says, trying to make a little joke, but failing really. He seems to realize it too and doesn't even chuckle at his own joke. "It's too much... I can't... I can't..." He breaks off, not able to complete the sentence, head still hanging so his face isn't in view. He sits there, breathing rather heavily for a while but otherwise silent.

Yi slips herself down onto the tree, giving the cub a bit more breather room. "Only two weeks. Well, some do not take very well to the Garou ways. It took me... hm, well, you can say I still have much to accept." She gazes upon the young Fang.

Justin shakes his head but not looking up, "I can't change what I am... I can't get rid of my OCD... I can't be bigger... coordinated... I can't..." A few little tears drop and he tries to wipe them away.

Yi creases her brow. "OCD?" she inquires after, in the way telling of her unfamiliarity with the term. The question stands, investigating one part of the Fang's words at a time.

Justin nods slowly, "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder." He says softly, letting the words hang there like bricks in the air, not dropping like they should.

Yi blinks a couple more times, giving silence time to hang its bricks before asking further, "What is that?"

Justin looks up, new streaks of tears on his face, "Cleaning... order... I have to clean things... fix things... I can't help it... and order... here... doesn't work..."

Yi ahs, sort of working it out in her head. "You feel like things must be neat and clean," she simplifies. "How is this bad?"

Justin nods a bit as he sees understanding and looks back down, "Have you been in the farm house? Weaver tainted... I was called that... already... People smearing things on the walls, messes... I don't know if I can be what I'm supposed to be... like this..."

Yi taps a finger against her cheek, looking off to the distance. "Well, the farmhouse is cleaner than it used to be," she notes aloud with a sidelong glance to the cub. "I guess that must be your work. It is a farm, though. And with Garou and cubs, it would be hard to keep clean." She even manages a smile. "But, you could always tell the ones who made the mess to clean it."

Justin gives a sigh, "N.. not if they aren't cubs..." He says softly, "Too many things aren't like they are supposed to be. It all feels just... wrong..." He kicks at some dirt, "I just want to go home.. .but I know I can't."

"All the more reason to tell them to clean up their messes," Yi points out with a raised finger, looking at the philodox. "If you do not tell them, then they will just do it again and again. If we did not wash dishes after we ate on them, then eventually there would be no more clean dishes to eat on." The finger lowers. "Though I am a Bone Gnawer. How wrong of me to be saying such things," she comments with an outward glance and some irony. "Even if you could go home, now that you know about all of this, what would you do?"

Justin shakes his head, "The non-cubs... would say I was over stepping myself... would get mad. It's clear cubs are at the bottom and shouldn't tell non-cubs what to do." He sighs, "I would let them know I love them... let them know I am okay. Make sure the police stopped looking for me so it didn't put my tribe at risk... I had an idea.. of Nikolai claiming to be an Uncle from Russia, claiming my family line. I'm adopted, so he could maybe fake something paper wise saying he's blood. That'd stop the FBI and I wouldn't have to worry about being arrested or caught. But... It doesn't matter." He kicks at some dirt again, "Won't happen."

Yi rolls a shoulder. "You might not know that. And maybe it would not seem as suspicious with the right papers. If your blood family were alive, I am sure your tribe elders would have contacted them immediately. But, with adopted cubs, it is hard to say." She skips a few beats, thinking. "Basil once asked if he could go back too. So he could see his mother. I told him that we could not let him do that, for the sake of keeping the Veil. But, once he was cliath, he could do so if he wanted." She looks back to the Fang. "And I say the same to you."

Justin shakes his head, "But it's not true. I can't. And it doen't matter." He says softly, "It doesn't matter because with OCD..." He trails off, then sighs again, "I'll never make it..."

Yi raises a finger again and pokes it towards the cub's head. Gently, but firmly. "And you are too young yet to be in Harano," the ragabash comments. "What is all this talk of hopeless feelings? Do the other cubs tell you this? Your own elders? Or are these all your own inner demons?"

Justin hesitates, "Everyone..." Then he pauses, "Not everyone... but cubs... others... not Clemency... she believes in me I guess." He admits, "But... my head hurts... I want to tear at walls... I've made two Garou thrall frenzy on me already..." He slumps again, then asks, "What's Harano?"

Yi answers, "It is a sadness deep within you. More than the feeling of a black sky that rains ice, colder than deepest winter. It is the feeling that there is no hope left. That there is no reason to live, and it grips your heart and spirit without letting go. It is like death, but without the peace that comes with dying." The way she talks of it, the Gnawer has experience. She gazes down to the dirt as well, and then shifts her gaze a little to look at the cub's foot. "Making a Garou enter frenzy is not difficult. Especially on a full moon."

Justin nods slowly, "Yeah..." He says softly, seeming at a loss of what to add. "I need to run... I feel trapped, but I can't run. I so want to run..." He says with a longing clear in his voice. He looks up slowly, letting his eyes reach towards the moon.

Yi lifts her eyes too. "You have chosen a good place to be, for running. A night like this, almost asks for the wolf inside to stretch its legs."

Justin shakes his head slowly, "I'm not supposed to even be here. Clemency said to stay at the farm house. I'm hoping this is close enough to it to count. I just... needed to be out here. I can't go running. I can't go into the woods... not really." He admits, "This... is a little taste, but bitter because it's all it is."

Making his way towards the pair and into the woods is Brom, oaked in sweat and frustration as he lumbers his way in. The large war hammer is strapped to his back and his jeans are torn about the knees and thighs. It appears that he is heading from the south.

"Are you ready for the woods?" Yi asks the Fang, looking to him now. "The woods have order, as all things have some of the Three in there. But it has more mess, unless you look hard. And if you think on it some more, there is order and neatness to much of what we do. Only the Wyld can claim to be without pattern."

Justin starts to shake his head slowly, starting to say something until the huffing Brom catches his attention as the large figure heads through the woods. Justin peers in the darkness then quickly wipes his face again to remove any trace of his previous tears. He freezes a bit, looking suddenly unsure.

"Yi Rhya." Brom says with a tilt of his head as he stops before the pair, large shit kicker boots crunching leaves and branches alike beneath his heavy weight. His hair is wild and free about his shoulders and neck, tangled bits of blonde in need of a good wash. "Kid." He says with a rumble in his throat, squinting his eyes and obviously not recognizing him.

Yi nods her head to the Forseti. "Good evening Brom," she greets readily. "Justin and I were just talking about some things." Justin receives a fleeting glance. "And he is faring pretty well."

Justin looks over at Yi then back at Brom. He starts to say something, stops himself but before someone else can pick up where he stopped he starts again, "Justin Alexis, Silver Fang Philodox cub. You met me in the barn, with Poe, when I was in wolf form for the first time." A little frown touches Justin's face.

"Oh. Yeah, you. I don't remember much of that night." Brom says with a sharp nod, then juts his large hand out to him. "Rips off the Face of the Forath and shoves it back up its ass. Forseti for the Get of Fenrir, Alpha of the unstoppable Fenrir pack Requiem, and now Master of the Challenge for the Sept."

Yi waits for introductions to pass. "Your deedname gets longer every time we meet, Forath-Ripper," she comments thoughtfully. Turning back to Justin, she adds, "You see? The farmhouse does not just mean the farmhouse, but there is also the barn, and the barnyard, and the fields by the woods. But, it is probably better to ask your elder when she comes around."

Justin stands as Brom extends a hand. The cub looks like he's getting ready to fight and is suprised by the offered hand. With a deeping frown he shakes the other Philodox's hand and says, "You don't recall that night? So.... you don't remember rejecting Poe as a student? Or calling Silver Fangs inbred and cousin fuckers?", he asks as he slowly shakes Brom's hand, with as firm a grip as he can manage, but not in an an agressive or trying to hurt way which would be foolish but more in a show no fear kind of way. He gives a quick nods a bit, to Yi, "Not enough woods to run in safely though... won't risk it." Then he looks back at Brom, still holding the large man's hand.

There is a loud snort from the Get of Fenrir. "Kid, get some thick skin if you're going to be offended about that. At least I'm not a coward and say such things behind your back like the rest of the fuckers out here do. I'm sure you and the rest of your family sit around and call us Fenrir a bunch of chin slobbering barbarians who can't even find their own asshole to wipe. I'll let you in on a secret though." Oh boy, that grip on the kids hand is tight, crushing even. "The night I ran into you and Poe, I just found out another smart mouthed cub sent me a nice, big, pink dildo. The very same night my house got burnt down and left my wife in the fucking street. So, I'm sure you can understand /why/ I was a bit aggravated on a big moon, and then having to deal with the retard that is my cub because he refuses to grasp the concept of the fact the Get of Fenrir /are/ the warriors of the Garou tribes and that he needs to stop acting like a god damn girl, no offense Yi, and start acting like a man."

Yi shrugs slightly, not taking much offense. There is interest though, in the ragabash's eyes to see how the Fang cub will respond.

Justin does a fairly good job of hiding his discomfort, although his hand has to be hurting. Still he retains the grasp, "Actually, Clemency said that the Get of Fenris were, in her words, scarily good fighters." He corrects as politely as he can, "However your words, when repeated to Clemency almost got me decapitated, when she thrall frenzied on me. This was before I knew anything about frenzies or Thralling." He says softly, "I surivived clearly, and if a smart mouthed cub did something like that to me I think I'd go find the cub in question and correct their behaviour in particular?" He offers, looking down at the firm grip of hands, trying to stand his ground but his slight form simply lacks the muscle to fight the tight grasp if Brom increases it much more. Right now he's just doing an impressive thing in not reacting to it or wincing too obviously.

"We aren't just scarily good fighters, we are the /best/ fighters, and remember that when shit hits the fan and you find yourself knee deep in it and I'm the only one standing that could save your ass." Brom pauses for a moment. "And I did do something about it. I found her, and I /Ripped. Her. Guts. Out./" He says each word, puncutating them purposely. "Why? Because she was too busy telling me to fuck off and that I was /wrong/ to have whooped on Basil's ass, when she.." He points to Yi with the other hand. "Told him to fight me so that he can get some experience. Here's the thing your generation hasn't learned yet because you're too busy watching MTV and whacking off to internet porn. "In the Garou soceity if you can't take a punch or throw a punch or even step in the ring, you're dead meat. If Basil is boo hoo'n over his scar, then he deserves to die on his Rite and the Gnawers should move on to the next glimmer of hope for their tribe. If he's smart, he'll learn from it, realize that what he wears is a mark of glory and should go around bragging that he stood up against /me/ in a fight and lived, because I'll be honest, I was sorely tempted to end his life, but I figured it'd be -frowned- upon, despite the fact all he does is drag my name through the mud and runs his mouth like the high school gossip in the girl's locker room. Garou, are about actions, not about words." He releases your hand, which might be a wee bit sore by now, then claps you hard on the shoulder. "If anything, I told Clemency the next day I felt bad for roughing you up, but she was out of her mind at the time so I'm sure she wasn't paying much attention."

Yi narrows her eyes a touch as she is pointed at, and particularly when the reference about Basil is made. She stands slowly, eyes shifting up towards the Get's. "Make no mistake," the ragabash puts forth quietly, in a manner too calm to be warm, "the Rites of Passage that Bone Gnawers give their cubs is no less than what the Get give to theirs. If he dies, he goes back to Gaia. If he lives, then he deserves his renown."

Justin looks some what relieved that his hand is released but tries to hide that fact. When he's clapped on the shoulder his small form ends up tipping a bit sideways. "I don't watch MTV or the like." He says softly, as he stares at Brom... or rather more at Brom's chest, it's what's at eye level after all. He takes a few steps back, and glances at Yi, a rather pained look on his face about something. Then the kid looks down at the dark earth. It's not a sign of direct submission, more like the kid is fighting with smething internally.

There is a loud snort from Brom as Yi speaks. He opens his mouth, closes it, opens it again, then lets out a huff. "The moon is too fucking big right now." He admits, then glances over to Justin. "Good, don't get into a habit of it. There isn't anything good on television anyways. There is nothing you can learn from it. So, anything else you need to say to me, cuz' I can tell you're itching to."

Yi sniffs once, and then turns to depart. "I will be heading back to the city," the ragabash states. "Maybe the next time we meet, Justin, you will have gotten permission from your elders to go beyond the farmhouse land. If Garou are about actions, and not about words... then show your elders that you can be trusted." The fostern nods politely to Brom, then to the cub. "Good night."

Justin gives a brief nod to Yi, not up to saying much to her sudden decision to depart then looks back to Brom. He frowns a bit, but still remains silent for the time being. A little tension arising.

"Good night Yi Rhya, Fenris guard your claws well." Brom then turns his eyes back to Justin, then eyes him for a moment. Despite the rippling surface of rage that has pooled about him, he is rather calm.

Justin watches Yi leave then puts his full attention on Brom, "Your words... If right, I'm in serious trouble. I'm of slight build, I'm not built like a warrior. I've been told cheeting is dishonorable. I don't know what I'm going to do if you're right." He says softly, "And that's why I'm upset."

Yi lifts a hand in a half-wave as she walks off, headed down towards the lane.

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